Generation...Different

Lately, I've been thinking about how different the students I work are from the teenagers of "my day." Ha ha ha. It is so funny to say that because I thought it was something only "old people" say. I guess I am getting there.

I know and understand it is the difference in the environment and the world that makes each generation different. But it is still a cycle, as we all find ourselves at some point sounding like the adults of our childhood. As a "young adult," I find it interesting the way my elders feel I should be living my life. The goals I have set for myself are not quite what they would have expected. Though I do not see an issue with the choices I have made, it is that difference they continue to preach about.

I, recently, had a birthday. A lady never tells her age, just know that I am old enough but not that old. I spoke to my 95 year ol grandmother, and these days you never know what is going to come out of her mouth. You cringe and wait, she is 95, she's earned it. We talked about me being a year older. I reminded her of my age and she said "So now that you're older, what are you going to do with your life?" Baffled, I paused, I feel my life is fruitful, but not by everyone's standards. I responded by letting her know that I was working full-time, in school full-time, offering access to other and taking control of my health and life. To her this meant, nothing as she responded "So you're not planning on getting married or anything?" I laughed it off and said "Not right now, but I will keep you posted." She still was not sure whether I got the point or not, but we moved on.

Later that week, I spoke with my aunt who is 20+ years younger than my grandmother. She knew my education and career were important, but she feels my life is missing something because I am not married. I laughed because here was the same conversation with the addition of the importance of education and career. She is always asking me about my dating life, and when will I get married. She has even offered to help me find a husband. I thought, why go looking when fate will bring the right person at the right time? But I let her continue her attempt to "marry me off."

While these two different generations share the same concern for my lack of marriage, I do not see a concern. I do not feel that being married or finding a husband is what defines me and the things that I can do in the world. For my grandmother's generation, it was common to be married at 16. For my aunt's generation, marriage is still important but so is career and education. For me, marriage is not at the top of my list. What is common between our generations, we all respect and understand the meaning of marriage and finding someone who is actually your other half. So while we see it differently, the same factors are of concern for us.

So, you're wondering how I ward off my grandmother. I just say "Grandma, when you find a man, and get re-married, I will follow your lead :-)" She laughs really hard and we move on to the next subject.