Pressure Parents

I was out the other night, I decided to go to dinner because well I was tired. When you are alone in a busy restaurant, you overhear more than you choose. There was a family of three sitting behind me, parents and a young teenage man. They were talking about his sporting event. From the moment they sat down, they were on his case as to what he needed to do to get better. He needed to improve and be more like another young man. Hearing these parents compare and mention all the negatives, broke my heart. I know they meant well, as any loving parent would. But I also know what these types of conversations can do to a child. Just hearing his voice, I guesstimated that he was probably in 9th grade. When I saw him, I was probably right.

There conversation then shifted to his college future. They had decided that he was going to have to attend a list consisting of only three school, all Ivy League or close to it. He vocal demeanor changed. Without malicious intent, they have managed to bring down the hopes of their young child. What was funny to me was that there was never a mention of his academics and how they needed to be cream of the crop to get into the school they mentioned. It will take more than a sport or two to get and keep a child in college and maintain success.

Hearing this conversation made me want to turn around and stop them. I wanted to encourage him not to limit himself. To enjoy his young days. I know that early awareness is important but when it comes with put-downs, it is counter-productive. I wanted to tell the parents to mention was he did well in his competition, what makes them proud. But, alas, I maintained my will-power not to throw myself into their conversation. My mother always tells me I need to learn not to always jump in to the rescue with my commentary. Everyone isn't looking for that. She is right, but I am a vocal person, especially when it is for the right reasons.

No I have no children of my own, but I do consider the young people to work with as partly my own. I learn so much from these young people. I do not know what the rules of good parenting are, but there are times that the person looking in from the outside, sees more than those in the situation