Bridalplasty

Tonight, as I flipped through the channels to find something to watch while I work. I come across a show on E! called Bridalplasty. I had to stop to see what this show was about. It is a show where engaged women compete for plastic surgeries to be "perfect" for their wedding day. As i watched this show several concerns came to mind:

• What perception has society created about marriage? Is the wedding that serious?
• What examples are being set for young women to love and appreciate themselves?
• Who in the world thought this should be a tv show?
• Is this healthy?
• What do the men who intend to marry these women think of them changing themselves completely?

Don't get me wrong, I respect those who choose to have a few surgeries to improve some things but a grocery list of things to fix for a wedding that lasts a few hours?!?! I was disturbing the see them put under the spot light to point out their imperfections. Aren't imperfections what make us human and individual? What really is perfection?

Many days my friends and I talk about the state of marriage in the US. With all of the reality shows about weddings, how we forgetten that it is about the marriage and not the wedding, the dress, the make-up, etc. When it is all said and done, you and your new spouse go home with each other to start a life. Why do we let something that lasts a few hours take so much control when the focus should be on the "bigger picture?" I'm a big picture kind of girl, so of course this is how I see it.

Now, if someone has proposed to you knowing you and loving you for who you are, why is it so important to attempt this perfection by way of sugery to change who you are for one day. To me, the engagement is the person's way of saying they love you for who you are, imperfections, flabby arms, weight loss skin and all. If you are changing yourself, is this person still marrying the person they became engaged to? It's like ordering a white dress and when it's time to wear it, it's purple.

My biggest concern was the body image. A few weeks ago, I did a workshop for a group of high school and college aged young ladies, encouraging them to love themselves. We all have flaws, but that's what makes us who we are. This show all alone negates all that I discussed with these young ladies. My hope is that my conversation with them sticks more than what they see on reality tv. It's concerning that these young intelligent women feel less than because they do not look like the women in the magazines. They were all beautiful in their own ways, tall, short, skinny, plus-sized, white, black, latina, etc. But no one is telling them that. I know because I once thought and felt like they do. Why should we encourage the lowering of the self-esteem of our young successful women? We have enough going against us, and only have but so much strength to fight a good battle.

As women we need to take a stand to love our differences and imperfections. Plastic surgery will not solve that emotional or other issue that lies beneath. Lift up each other. To the women on this show, you are beautiful in your own waysm and you have a man in your life that thinks you are perfect in his eyes. Is this all necessary?